Indian team recalls ex-cricketers after humiliating exit from ICC trophy

By Aja Ja Re Ja October 3, 2009

Johannesburg: Indian Cricket Team suffered an early humiliating exit from ICC Champion’s Trophy winning only one match against the West Indies. Main cause of their exit is being termed as the loss against arch rivals Pakistan. However, some believe that the real cause is the recent phenomenon of Indian cricketers taking to the world of glamour. For instance, Ishant Sharma doing the fly mobile ad with Malaika Arora Khan and Dhoni’s affection towards Shar Rukh Khan.

However, some dignified cricketers are not falling into this trap and are choosing to not see, hear or talk about anything that is happening around them.

Selectors have however taken notice and they are now recalling ex-cricketing greats into the team who would have no chance of a career in glamour. Each of these cricketers brings something unique to the table which will help India’s bid towards winning the next ICC trophy.

1) Dodda Ganesh

Dodda Ganesh had a short lived cricket career. This is because most of his balls were hit for boundaries. Dodda Ganesh has taken only five Test wickets at a high average of 57.4 at the international level. However, this is because he is not suited for test cricket played during the day with a red ball against a white sight screen. Selectors have realized that his abilities come to the fore when he is playing a day-night match.

During a day night match, it won’t matter what kind of ball Dodda pitches because batsman has no way of seeing it until the ball bounces right before him. Therefore selectors are hoping that Dodda will pitch some balls in line with the wickets and be the leading wicket taker in the next ICC trophy for India.

2) Nikhil Chopra

Nikhil Chopra was an off spinner who could also dance and give poor unrelated commentary on star sports. His most effective weapon was the pony tail he had when he came on the team in the early days. Bowling with that pony tail with the goggles on used to irritate the batsman all the time. He was removed because it also irritated the viewers. However, he is now thought to be close to the Pakistan team and can bring in some strategies in the team to tackle their next match against them.

3) Joginder Sharma

Who can forget the man who deceived Misbah in the T20 final to win the match against Pakistan. Joginder Sharma plays with the mind of the batsmen and his key tool is his unexpected pace. His menacing looks and rhythmic run up make the batsmen think that a real fast Yorker is coming their way, however the ball is a slow paced lollipop usually. This technique has been taught to Gully cricketers since time immemorial and is called the ‘Lalchi Ball’. Most batsmen get deceived by it and it is this ball that made Pakistan ‘Mis-Bah’ just 5 runs in the final.

4) Hrishikesh Kanitkar

The man who lofted Saqlain Mushtaq for a four to win a 314 run chase against Pakistan in the third and final match of the series is remembered by everyone. Unfortunately, that was probably the only boundary he ever hit. He was plagued by injuries because a lot of his servants and their friends kept hitting him for reasons unknown to him. Now that the real culprit is found, there are no more misunderstandings and selectors have brought him in the team to hit more 4s against Pakistan.

5) Sadagopan Ramesh

By far the batsman who frustrated bowlers the most due to his utter lack of any sort of technique, S Ramesh, is now being brought back to frustrate the hell out of opposition bowlers. Ramesh applies Fevicol to his front foot before going into bat every time, can look towards only his leg side, has no wristwork and has tried to play a pull shot on a Yorker once. His USP is that you cannot set a field for him or predict what he is going to do. A bat is like a log in his hands and in that respect selectors think he is much like Dhoni, albeit less effective. Ramesh’s inclusion is guaranteed to destroy any game plan the opposition has.

COI hopes that with the inclusion of these ex cricketing greats, who have absolutely no chance of making it in the glamour world, Indian team will be able to concentrate more on the game of cricket and will win its next major tournament and thus justify all the ridiculous ICC awards Indians have been winning at the recently held ICC award function.